Those of us that have experienced extreme abuse can benefit greatly from learning about Narcissistic abuse. The patterns of narcissistic abuse match extreme forms of abuse very well. We can learn so much about our own relationship patterns and their cause, from studying this topic.
This is my recommendation for research. Information about Narcissism and codependency, especially regarding adult relationships, is widely available. I recommend people such as Ross Rosenberg and YouTube channels such as “begood4000” and “Melanie Tonia Evans”, as I find their teachings quite calm, reasoned and realistic. I have found some people online that express a lot of anger when talking about this issue and I find this is not helpful for me – yet it may be exactly what you need.
I strongly recommend learning about Narcissistic abuse, as a way to accelerate healing from past abuse.