Eating food to feel sick

Some people have the habit of repeatedly eating food that makes them feel sick. It is a kind of addiction. Before eating the food, there is only the consideration of its taste. Once eaten, then comes the ill feeling that is the intention of the behavior. It is a typical addiction.

I’m writing about this because its an addiction i have had all my life, and i have recently made significant progress with it. Suddenly I’m eating much less sugar, and feeling much better.

I have tried to resolve this issue for a long time, but only recently I was direct enough with myself to acknowledge to actual consequences of my addiction. I realized i was eating sugary foods in order to feel sick.

As an adult, this makes no sense at all. This refusal to acknowledge things that dont make sense is part of the denial, part of the addiction. Because it is not logical, nonsensical, we can avoid considering the actual reality of the situation. However, the decision to employ this lifestyle strategy was not made as an adult. It was made in the early years of life.  A child can easily make such a decision, because it is without an understanding of the long term consequences. The decision is made to achieve a short term goal. The decision is very logical.

Sick is safe.

This is the logic that solves the childhood problem. When a child feels sick, they are less likely to receive anger from the adults around them. They are less likely to resist and fight against treatment they dont like, and therefore less likely to engage in a confrontation with adults which results in suffering. They may even get sympathy and care. Either way, for some children, being sick leads to a better life.

As a child, we decide “Im going to be like this from now on”. We dont decide “Im going to be like this until …”. As children we make decisions “from now on”. These decisions apply until we undo them. no matter how deeply they are hidden in our unconscious minds. They control our lives until they are undone.

Only when i made the connection between sickness and safety, could i make progress with my addiction. I spent a while thinking in different ways about the issue, but only when i considered it in this way did i start eating less sugar.

I used a guided visualization to address this childhood decision and undo it. I used a process by Christopher Howard called the “Decision Destroyer”. Its not the only guided visualization that can undo obsolete childhood decisions. There are others that will work just fine. I have also used visualizations by Brandon Bays that have been really effective. And i have used visualizations i have created myself “on the fly”. My experience is that the results of doing visualizations are permanent. Once the childhood decision is changed, there is no relapse, because the cause is removed.

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Eating food to feel sick

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